No Laughing Matter

Dear Marsha,

I am 16 years old and going through a very rough time at school right now.  I am overweight you see, and I am getting teased by not only the other girls, but the boys too.  I can not help I am largely proportioned. I do not over eat. I don’t even eat much candy. These people need to know that they are hurting my feelings. I try to laugh everything off, but deep inside it really hurts my feelings. I have homecoming coming up soon. I don’t want to go. I can just see everyone laughing at me for being in a dress with no date. I have a few friends at school though that want me to go with them. I just can’t take the laughs anymore. What should I do? Do I go to homecoming? If I go, how do I put up with the rude comments and jokes?

Thank you for understanding,

No Laughing Matter

Dear No Laughing Matter,

It is a great shame that our society puts pressure on everyone to be thin and gorgeous as our super models are.  It is an even bigger shame that people like to make fun of others for what ever it may be that is out of their “Normal” range. This is the same for size as well as appearance, speech, language, skin color, religion, or gender.

Each of us were made different. Even identical twins have differences setting them apart from one another.  This is what makes us unique and special in our own way.

The majority of our human race is a little “over weight” according to their studies. In 1941 the average size for a woman was 5′2″ tall and 129 pounds.  However the average woman of today is 5′4″ and weighs 144 pounds.  This is a normal size 12 or 14. I am going to go one step further for you then this study shows.

Think back to our history lessons, think of all of  the art portraits portraying beautiful women during the Renaissance era.  Every Queen, every Baroness, Duchess, or any other woman of nobility that had her portrait painted was a well rounded woman.  Now picture all of the cherub paintings you can recall in history: Can you think of just one photo without them being plump?  How many ancient statues of women can you recollect holding the baskets of grapes and are only clothed with a drape around their mid sections, are they thin?

The truth of the matter is, round is the norm for women.  It has been the “Normal” shape throughout history.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with being a full sized gal.

In some countries still today, the men prefer their women to be a fuller size. That is what they find attractive.  I am telling you this from the bottom of my heart.  What I say is true, for I, Myself, am married to a man that feels this exact way.

I would like for you to attend your Homecoming.  Make it a special occasion.   Have your hair, nails, and make up done.  Feel like the beautiful woman you really are. When you buy your dress, look for one that will flatter your figure instead of drawing attention to it.

Below are some examples of “Plus sized” women looking GREAT in dresses:

I know that hateful words can often be depressing and painful.  This is something you will find in all walks of life.  The best thing you can do for yourself, is to know that you are a beautiful person, and try to remain positive.  Keep a smile on your face, and when someone says something negative, tell them that you are sorry they feel that way, and walk on.

Always,

Marsha

Tags: Average, Cherub, Dress, Full sized, Girl, History, Homecoming, Large, No Laughing Matter, Normal, Over Weight, Positive, Queen, Renaissance, Rounded, Smile, Teased

This entry was posted on Wednesday, September 2nd, 2009 at 3:49 PM and is filed under Advice, Teens. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.