Hello Marsha,
I would like to write you to ask for a huge favor. My sister is a flirt. Every boyfriend I bring home, she is always trying to be cutesy and gain their attention. I feel as if she thinks they have to like her more than they do me. My sister has always been the smart and good looking one. She has never had trouble getting boyfriends, so I don’t understand why she wants to act like that around mine.
What would you do if your sister always dressed skimpy when your boyfriends came over, and flirted with him. Please tell me what I can do to get her to stop. I just want to cry when she does this to me.
Flirty Sister
Dear Flirty Sister,
I can understand why this would hurt you. It is not right for family, especially an immediate family member to act like a flirt toward your boyfriend, or any family members boyfriend. That is very disrespectful.
I have tried looking at the situation through her perspective, and the only conclusions I have come up with is perhaps even though you think she is pretty, she may have a low self esteem about herself . She may be trying to gain the attention of your boyfriends to feel better about herself. Then again, maybe she flirts naturally without knowing she is flirting, and does this so that your boyfriends will accept her as your “cool” sister. It doesn’t really matter what the reason is, it is still inappropriate.
I would suggest that you let your sister know how you really feel about her attitude and personality changes when you bring company home. Sometimes a heart to heart conversation that displays our true emotions can move mountains on any situation. She is your sister, and there is no room for hatred within family if preventable. You should both love and respect one another, even if this means she needs to change her personality around your boyfriends or any house guests.
There is also the option of not bringing your boyfriend to your home. If possible, try going to his house instead, or just going out on a date. This would prevent your sister from having access to act like such a fool in front of them. If your sister brings up the topic of why you never bring your boyfriend/s to home anymore, tell her the truth. This would also be a good time to have that heart to heart conversation.
I also would like for you to consider the fact that if a boyfriend is worth having, and really loves you, then he is not going to pay attention to your sister. A good man would turn his head or make comments about her being rude and disrespectful to you (her sister.)
Always,
Marsha
